CapeCodOnline.com – A Hyannis man was ordered to wear a GPS tracking device for two years and is to be confined to his home for six months after he pleaded guilty to masturbating in the Cape Cod Mall parking lot in August 2014, according to police and court documents.

A woman told police that a man, who was later identified as Lombardi, drove a sport utility vehicle while holding up a phone and pulled up next to her car so his driver’s side door was a foot away from her driver’s side door, according to a Barnstable police report. She also told police she could see his right hand moving up and down on his erect penis while he was holding up an iPhone in his left hand with the camera facing her.

When she realized what was happening, the victim looked away and called police, according to the report. Lombardi then drove away, but the victim relayed his license plate to police, according to the report.

Oh come on man, like I don’t already have enough to worry about when I go to Hyannis. I’ve got one eye out to make sure I don’t get beat up and have my girl and my vodka stolen. The other eye is on the lookout out for 12 year old heroin dealers, and now I can’t even go shopping at the mall without worrying about getting a pearl necklace walking through the parking lot?

Getting through Hyannis these days is like a nineteen year old blonde from Topeka trying to navigate the porn industry.

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Cameos by locally owned TRC favorites Falmouth Raw Bar, Mocean and Yoga Girl Cape Cod

New England Boating pulled off some pretty bad ass fishing scenes with Shaun from Riptide Charters

I actually had some reservations about posting this because they talk about some places I’d rather not share with the rest of the world, but that is the deal I signed up for as an ambassador of The Real Cape. Being a lightning rod is not an easy life and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but it is the cross I bear. Sometimes you need to make sacrifices for the good of the herd, and some days I even have to put on pants. Blog life ain’t easy.

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Discovery – On a trip to Boston in 2007, Irish Mike met his wife Amelia at a science fiction/fantasy convention, and they soon settled in a small cottage in the woods, on the island of Martha’s Vineyard, MA. There, they raise their children Nova (6) and Christopher (4).

Also in early 2007, Mike was commissioned to construct a ridiculously huge sword. He posted a video on YouTube that depicts him huffing, staggering, and generally demonstrating the impracticality of the weapon. Almost immediately, Mike was inundated with emails from strangers who wanted giant, impractical swords of their own.

How this slipped past me is astounding. Gotta love it though, anything that shines a national spotlight on the Cape and Islands is a win. Especially since Irish Mike seems to be taking it all in stride and has a good sense of humor.

Everyone tune in tonight at 10 and give some local support on a national level.

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CapeCodTimes.com – A Hyannis man and a Plymouth woman pleaded not guilty Monday in Barnstable District Court to charges related to an alleged altercation with a man over 60, according to court documents.

James Silva, 56, pleaded not guilty to assault and battery on a person over 60 and Julie Miller, 44, pleaded not guilty to two counts of destruction of property more than $250, and larceny under $250, according to court records.

The victim told police Miller became angry after they talked at his apartment on Main Street in Hyannis late Sunday night and left with a bottle of vodka, according to a police report. When he followed her and tried to take back the bottle, Miller called for help and Silva came from his apartment upstairs in the same building and allegedly punched the victim in the head. Silva and Miller went back to Silva’s apartment, according to the report.

About five minutes later, Miller returned to the victim’s door because she had forgotten some belongings in his apartment, according to the report. Miller then allegedly kicked in the door, which landed on the victim’s television, according to the report.

Total power move by James Silva. What would you do if some chick stole a bottle of vodka from your neighbor and started yelling when he tried to take it back? Well my man Jimmy boy punches his neighbor in the head, takes the bottle of vodka and the girl. No regard whatsoever for the commandments, dude just coveting the shit out of all of his neighbors stuff.

How about the poor bastard that has already lost his girl and his booze, and just when he thinks the carnage is over she kicks in his door onto his television? Tough night all around for that guy. One minute you’re getting drunk, watching American Idol with a lady, and the next thing you know you’re sober, with ice on your head, all alone, with no TV, and a busted door. That’s some Lemony Snicket type shit right there, talk about a series of unfortunate events.

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HyannisNews.com – After allegations of numerous drug deals on the premises, one involving a 12-year-old and another minor, the Barnstable Licensing Authority voted to revoke all of the Shanghai Chinese Restaurant’s business licenses.

Barnstable Police Lieutenant John Murphy and Barnstable Patrolman Steve Maher gave testimony today regarding at least 10 instances where illicit drug sales allegedly took place inside the restaurant.

The most shocking testimony highlighted a case where a 12-year-old delivered heroin which he had kept inside one of his socks. That particular drug deal allegedly took place right at the bar.

Unbelievable. Just shockingly bad parenting right there. By 12 years old a boy should know that when he is dealing heroin in a seedy Chinese restaurant he has to at least do it in the bathroom, not right at the bar. You need to have situational awareness and know that the place is probably under surveillance. Any parent worth their salt should teach a kid that age that the cops can’t put cameras in the bathrooms.

I can see a 10 year old making such a silly mistake, but a 12 year old? Come on, that’s just lazy parenting.

 

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CapeCodOnline.com – The Barnstable Licensing Authority voted unanimously today to rescind Shanghai Chinese Restaurant’s business licenses, ruling that the Hyannis establishment has been taken over by drug dealers and turned into a haven for heroin and cocaine sales.

The decision comes nearly a month after Barnstable police and several other law enforcement agencies raided the Ridgewood Avenue restaurant and arrested two men on drug charges. Three other men were later arrested in connection with the three-month investigation into drug sales at the restaurant, in which police recorded several heroin and cocaine deals involving the five men and a “confidential source” who worked with investigators.

It’s officially curtains for the Shanghai. It’s surprising to say the least. I’ve said it a million times that I always thought seedy Chinese food places were kind of like international waters. I just didn’t think our laws applied in places like this, but it looks like Barnstable is challenging that notion.

Someone should really do a study on the correlation between coke dealers and Chinese food restaurants in small town America. It is one of the great mysteries of modern society why they gravitate towards these places. Do drug dealers really love Mai Thai’s and beef teriyaki that much? If someone were to make a documentary on this phenomenon I would donate to their Kickstarter campaign in a heartbeat.

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