Bourne Bridge To Close For Entire Year After Bones Discovered During Gas Cleanup

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WQUK- Officials say that during excavation of the Bourne rotary, in an effort to clean up gas spilled from a fuel tanker accident, crews uncovered what seems to be an ancient burial ground. The area the bones were found reaches from the rotary to the edge of the Cape Cod Canal forcing a complete shut down of the bridge that officials say will last at least a year.

Well cancel the summer and start planning the funeral because Cape Cod just died. This is the end times folks, rumors coming out of Bourne are that we have our forefathers to blame for this nightmare. Check out this quote from FIRSTresponse Environmental services spokeswoman April Springer…

“From the way the bones are piled up it looks like they may have been excavated during the digging of the canal and dumped here illegally, possibly to avoid a stoppage in construction.”

No wonder they were able to build the bridge faster than it took us to paint it, they cheated by starting with a big pile of bones. What a bunch of fools.

Buckle up everyone, it’s going to be a long summer.

Click Here for the tanker crash info

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

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Comments 73

  14. You don't even have to check the calendar. It's BANNERED in the top left corner, like all articles here always are. and just by the way: the Gas Tanker really flip over.

  20. Yea, I was expecting him to be from somewhere no where near here. Then we find out, hes from MA too. Who from anywhere around here doesn't know its a rotary?

  30. WTF!!!! If this is a joke its in very poor taste not to mention that anyone reading this hearing " officials say", people tend to believe that shit when they're mentioned!

  31. WTF!!!! If this is a joke its in very poor taste not to mention that anyone reading this hearing " officials say", people tend to believe that shit when they're mentioned!

  32. WTF!!!! If this is a joke its in very poor taste not to mention that anyone reading this hearing " officials say", people tend to believe that shit when they're mentioned!

  33. WTF!!!! If this is a joke its in very poor taste not to mention that anyone reading this hearing " officials say", people tend to believe that shit when they're mentioned!

  34. WTF!!!! If this is a joke its in very poor taste not to mention that anyone reading this hearing " officials say", people tend to believe that shit when they're mentioned!

  39. I don't believe most businesses on the Cape would agree. 43% of the Cape's economic base is made up of Tourism. Source: Cape Cod Chamber of Commerce.

  50. This was funny yesterday, it needs to be removed now, it is still being shared. Cape Cod lives on tourism dollars and this will impact Cape economy if it continues to be shared.

  51. So Cape Cod lives off tourist traffic. People (not from the Cape) are going to believe this, part of the story is true a tanker did roll over there. The link is still being shared and it's not April fools day anymore. If I owned a business on the Cpae I'd be pissed!

  52. Archeologists have discovered the remains of the well known "Chief Closeabridgeortwo" and the bridge will now be closed for two years as they bring in a team of Harvard Dropouts to exhume the remaining artifacts. STAY TUNED AS THIS IS BREAKING NEWS.

  53. If this is an April fools joke IT'S NOT FUNNY!!! WHO EVER POSTED THIS IS AN IDIOT AND HAS NO COMMON SENSE! Makes me sick!

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