As some of you know from our Facebook page a few of the Real Cape staffers made a friendly impromptu wager on the Super Bowl. Insane Tony not being of sound mind and body picked the Denver Broncos while Hippie and Hamwey had Seattle. The stakes were high and now Insane Tony will have to get a tattoo chosen by Hippie and Hamwey. While the design will be chosen for him, Tony will be able to choose the location of the tattoo on his body.

I will announce the design two weeks from today and Tony will then have a week to decide where on his body to put it. So please help us with suggestions of what you would like to see tattoo’d on Insane Tony’s body by commenting below, on Facebook or Twitter. So far the front runner might be an “I love Wareham” tat.

Also while you are commenting let us know what Cape Cod tattoo parlor you think we should use for this spectacle.

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HARWICH — When you hear the name “Harwich,” what thought comes to mind? The chamber of commerce wants the answer to that question to be a positive one and is taking steps to ensure that is the case.

The chamber has entered into a contract with North Star Destination Strategies, a Nashville-based company which helps communities retain a positive image through branding. Over the past eight months, community leaders and the chamber have been soliciting input that will assist in branding Harwich.

The branding process could take up to a year. The contract with North Star Destination Strategies carries a $42,000 price tag. The town is helping fund the project through an increased chamber of commerce appropriation for promoting Harwich in the annual town meetinglast year. That appropriation went from $22,000 to $35,000.

How did not one person involved see how awful this idea is? Do I even need to point out the ridiculous irony here? The Harwich Chamber of Commerce, an organization whose sole purpose in this world is to promote local businesses and be a champion for the local economy of Harwich, hired a NASHVILLE company to establish their brand and essentially tell Harwich what it means to be Harwich?! Get the fuck out of here.

You can’t get any less Real Cape than this move, this is Fake Cape shit. $42,000 of Cape Cod money is now in Ten ah god damn see? Hey Harwich Chamber of Commerce get off my peninsula with this crap. You want some branding? Put this in your pamphlet…

Harwich. The Idaho of Cape Cod… nobody knows where the fuck it is!

P.S. We love you, people of Harwich, just kidding about the Idaho thing, just pointing out how much your Chamber of Commerce sucks.

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CapeNews.net – A suspect wanted in connection with the armed robbery of KC’s Drapery & Blind Design on Route 151 in Mashpee was apprehended early this afternoon after a one-hour standoff with police.

Mashpee Police Chief Rodney C. Collins said that the suspect displayed a firearm and demanded money  at the store, and then fled on foot to a home on nearby Algonquin Avenue.

You know we get a ton of shit for posting police reports here but how the hell am I supposed to ignore something like this? This dude robbed a DRAPERY store! Dude, go where the money is. I’ve already posted about how easy it is to rob a bank but these dumb ass Cape criminals won’t listen.

I’m pretty sure armed robbery carries the same penalty for robbing KC’s Drapery as it does for knocking off a Rockland Trust bro. If you’re gonna rob someone at least give yourself a chance at a decent pay day. I’m pretty sure there isn’t a big money windfall coming your way when you’re fencing stolen Venetian Blinds to old ladies on Craigslist.

P.S. For all you people whose feelings we hurt because we are meanies to criminals, tell them not to rob a fucking window dressing store with a gun or suck on nitrous in the dairy aisle and we promise to leave them alone.

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With a healthy mix of straight rock and roll and stretching the imagination, they will keep you mesmerized for their entire show. Ghosts of Jupiter is made up of Nate Wilson (lead vocals, keyboards formally of Percy Hill), Johnny Trama (guitar), Adam Terrell (guitar, also of Assembly of Dust), Tommy Lada (bass), and Thomas Arey (drums). They have shared the stage with the likes of  Blue Oyster Cult, moe., Buffalo Killers and Dead Meadow.

With so much on the horizon for these gents, you need to catch them while you can here on good ol’ Cape Cod. It is just your luck that you have the chance to tear up the dance floor at The Beach House in North Falmouth tonight.

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Mass DPH has finally issued marijuana dispensary permits…

Get your med cards folks, there’s gonna be weed stores on The Cape!

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“We’re locals and on weekday nights in the summer we sit across the street from a Chatham bar, usually the squire, and take bets on whose drunk can stumble down the street the farthest. Usually they end up on the bench 50 feet away. This night was fourth of july and I knew when this guy came out he was a winner. He made it halfway down main street and ended up in the bushes on a side road. I had to take a victory photo because my drunk currently holds the distance record.”

This is so Cape Cod it hurts. While most kids are playing video games on weekday nights, Chatham’s youth are outside The Squire picking drunks like ponies and seeing how far they can make it from the bar. I guarantee you that dude in the red shirt has woken up naked in an inner tube floating in Nantucket Harbor many times, he’s as Real Cape as it gets.

If you have a photo that represents the Real Cape Cod please submit it below or use the link at the top of the page. From sunsets to drunken comedy and everything in between, we want to see what you see. (Author is optional)

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WickedLocal.com – All but one local editor for the region south of Boston remain employed after the online news company Patch notified staff nationwide of layoffs Wednesday.

Launched in 2007, Patch was bought by AOL in 2009 and quickly expanded to hundreds of local websites across the country.

We have three local Patch sites on The Cape including Falmouth, Barnstable and Martha’s Vineyard. The editors of all of them have been laid off following AOL’s sale of the company. News websites seem to be dropping like flies lately and meanwhile The Real Cape is growing exponentially, so that makes me a Cape internet guru right?

Well in my new role as the foremost internet mind on Cape Cod I am going to give out some free insight into the success of The Real Cape and advice for fledgling Cape websites. The key to internet traffic is to maintain a level of integrity and transparency through responsible journa… juuust kidding, GIANT SNOW DICKS!

 

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