Sweden Wants To Ban American Lobsters From Europe

BOSTON (AP) — The Massachusetts congressional delegation is joining its Maine counterparts in questioning a push by the Swedish government to declare American lobsters an invasive species.

Sweden wants the European Union to bar imports of live American lobsters into the 28-nation bloc, a response to the appearance of 32 American lobsters in Swedish waters.

Massachusetts’ delegation has sent a letter to Secretary of State John Kerry and others saying the Swedish claim needs to be backed up with scientific evidence.

Woah, Woah, Woah, don’t even try it Mr. Neutral. You’re just jealous because our lobsters are bigger, jucier and tastier than yours. Just wait until Trump hears about this, he’ll be calling for an all out ban on hot Swedish blondes meatballs so fast your pale little heads will spin.

I guess since you Swedish pricks didn’t do anything to help stop Hitler you figured you’d pick an easier target to go after. Well I’ve got news for you there Magnes ver Magnessen von Magnessenessen, we protect our own here in America. If those 32 American lobsters want to go to skiing we fully expect you to open up your nicest chalets and give them discounted lift tickets to Mt. Sarektjakkaktkjatjkkavatttensburjkg.

If any harm should come to the 32 American lobsters in your custody, or if you do ban American lobsters from your little European club, we will ban the banning of using nuclear weapons on American lobster hating douchebags. How you like them apples?

P.S. This goes for all Swedes except that chick that smashed Tiger Woods with a golf club and ended the greatest golfing career in history. We don’t want any trouble with her.