CapeCod.com – The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has approved a groundbreaking plan that will allow increased access to Nauset Beach in Orleans for off-road vehicles during the nesting shorebird season.

The habitat conservation plan creates a way for vehicles to be escorted past piping plover chicks.

Nauset beach has been closed to off-road traffic for many years during the prime summer weeks once the birds hatch. The area remains off-limits until they fledge – which usually doesn’t happen until mid-to-late August.

The new plan includes measures to protect chicks on a nearly one-mile stretch of Nauset, including a pedestrian escort walking in front of each vehicle.

Chalk one up for rational thought! Nauset Beach will actually be open to humans again. It almost seems like the world has come to its senses… right up until you read the measures taken to get this deal done that is.

“Including a pedestrian escort walking in front of each vehicle”… did I really just read that? We have created a Piping Plover Secret Service now? How much does that cost? I suppose we are going to need to deploy a few good men to secure the beachgrassy knoll to make sure the area is clear of snipers as well? Maybe create a no fly zone above the Plovers patrolled by F-15’s with standing orders to shoot down hawks with SCUD missiles?

I would love to see someone tally up the amount of money we’ve spent so far on protection and legislation involving Plovers. I’m willing to bet the farm that it’s more than we’ve spent on Heroin abuse prevention and treatment. Maybe that’s the way to end the drug epidemic? Maybe we should divert all funds from Piping Plovers to heroin programs. Won’t happen though, obviously it’s more important to keep a few birds safe than it is to keep our own kids alive.

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Interested.

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

ACK.net – The Trustees of Reservations, which oversees much of Great Point and the Coskata-Coatue Wildlife Refuge along with the Nantucket Conservation Foundation, has announced that piping plovers, a threatened bird species, have made their annual spring arrival on the island, but vehicular access to the point remains open, and will likely remain so for another month or more.

Fred Pollnac, the new Nantucket superintendent of the Trustees, said habitat fencing has been erected in several places along Coskata-Coatue, including The Galls, with reduced speed limits established.

The birds have not yet started making nests, he said. When they do, usually around early to mid-June, vehicular access to the point could be closed, while pedestrian access will remain open.

Piping plovers are small, sand-colored birds that often nest and hatch near vehicle tracks, and are very difficult to spot with the naked eye.

And so begins the Cape and Islands Lottery. Where will they nest this year? Will they take up residence on your favorite spot at your favorite beach? Will you show up one day to the same spot you’ve been going for 20 years only to find ropes keeping you out? Will some tiny bird that is not even close to endangered in other places on earth completely ruin your summer?

Just remember, they are very small and sand colored. Very hard to see. Nobody could possibly blame you if you accidentally stepped on a Piping Plover. Not only because they are so camouflaged, but who would even suggest doing something like that on purpose? It’s unfathomable.

P.S. Are you new here and feel bad for Piping Plovers? CLICK HERE

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

SJ – Thirty years ago, Hilda Lee Cash lost her high school class ring on a beach in Cape Cod.

Cash, a former Rumford resident who has since married and changed her surname to McCrillis, will soon be reunited with that Rhode Island ring, thanks to the man who found it and Rumford police Sgt. Doug Maifeld.

Maifeld said he received a message earlier this via the department’s Facebook site from Skip Wolsieffer of Osterville, Mass. Wolsieffer wrote that in the summer of 1985, he found a North Kingston High School class ring on Marconi Beach in Wellfleet, Mass.

Inscribed on the band was “Hilda Lee Cash.”

Wolsieffer, 66, said Thursday he found the ring in the summer of 1985.

“I was just out for an enjoyable walk on the beach and I saw a tiny speck of reflection,” he said. He took the ring home and called the North Kingston Police Department. He said an officer told him Cash had left the state and he didn’t have any other information.

So Wolsieffer put the ring in a drawer. He tried searching the Internet for Cash in 2000.

“I didn’t find anything,” he said. “The search engines available then weren’t what they are now.”

After many years of fruitless efforts to find Cash and return the ring, Wolsieffer learned that she had married and that her last name was now McCrillis and she lived in Rumford. He contacted Rumford police and shared his story.

Maifeld checked and learned she had moved, but her family was still living on Hancock Street in Rumford. They told Maifeld that McCrillis now lives in New York and gave him her phone number.

“I called her and asked, ‘Did you lose your class ring on a beach in Cape Cod?’ and she said, ‘I haven’t seen that ring in 30 years!'” Maifeld said.

Whoa whoa whoa. The part of the story I don’t like is that this dude gave up looking for Hilda after like an hour. He didn’t put posters up or anything, he just sat on the porch like a goon and waited. That dude’s gotta think ‘You found a ring. You got a responsibility.’ If you find Hilda’s ring you don’t look for her for like an hour then call it quits. You get your ass out there and you find that fucking chick.

Come on bro, it took you thirty years to find a chick named “Hilda Lee Cash” that graduated from North Kingston High in 1985? Ummm… you don’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to solve a mystery with that many clues, it’s not like you’re looking for Sue Jones from New York City. How many Hilda’s are even from Rhode Island? Like three?

P.S. In all seriousness though, this dude Skip really must be like the nicest guy in the world. I wouldn’t spend one second looking for the owner even if I found a baby on the beach, let alone some random person’s ring. What I’m saying is we’d all be better off if there were more Skips in the world… and less me.

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

CCT – According to the United States Army Corps of Engineers (USACE), the restrictions are necessary to complete the painting project.

Monday through Saturday, from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., one lane will be open in each direction. Depending upon the weather, Sunday work may also be required. All four lanes will be open each evening.

The Monday through Saturday lane restrictions are expected to be in effect through Wednesday, May 20, according to USACE.

We are well past the 2 year point now painting the Sagamore Bridge. They said December, they said February, they said April, now they are saying May 20th. Anyone want to bet they miss that date too? This project is reaching Big Dig levels of ineptitude. If there are lane restrictions through another summer we need to fire everyone. I don’t even think you can fire the Army Corps of Engineers, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try.

I’ve said this many times but it bears repeating because it is so unreal. It has taken us longer to paint The Sagamore bridge in the 21st century than it took for them to build it in the 1930’s. Mankind is officially regressing.

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

CapeCodTimes.com – Police and fire officials have responded to a vehicle that crashed into a building at the intersection of Route 28 and Bearses Way.

The accident occurred at about 6:30 p.m. in the Bobby Byrne’s shopping plaza. The sport utility vehicle hit the Mid-Cape Medical Center at 489 Bearses Way.

Nobody was injured in the crash, according to a Barnstable police official.

77. My guess is 77. Driving into breakfast places and medical supply houses is quite a popular pastime with the silver foxes.

P.S. Do they just call anything with a hatchback an SUV now?

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

See? This is what happens when you start giving away homes on The Vineyard to people from Alabama. It was only a matter of time until the riff raff moved in and started vandalizing signs. Summer People, Some are Not must be some kind of redneck rallying cry or something, who else would use such an offensive tagline?

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony