This photo of the Barnstable 4th of July parade was sent in by an anonymous reader simply labeled “This Guy”. Normally we wouldn’t just publish photos of random people simply because they have spectacular hair. But this hair is extra special.

We don’t like to start rumors or print anything about famous person sightings on The Cape unless they are backed with proof, so I am going to refrain from any commentary here. No way am I going to add any flame to the fire of unsubstantiated speculation with any jokes or insinuation.

I will however just leave this here for you to look at. Not because it is in any way related to the reader photo, only because it’s a cool pic that I’d thought I’d share.

If you have a photo that represents the Real Cape Cod please submit it below or use the link at the top of the page. From beautiful sunsets to drunken comedy and everything in between, we want to see what you see. (Author is optional)

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Capecodonline.com – HYANNIS — On Saturday, the longest night of the year, Cape Codders will gather to remember the local members of the homeless population who died in 2013.

The memorial service for the homeless – part of the National Homeless Service Memorial Day – will be at 5 p.m. on the Hyannis Village Green, said Alan Burt, the organizer.

This will be followed by a 7 p.m. gathering in Cape Cod Covenant Church, 11 Satucket Road, Brewster, with volunteers who plan to sleep outside the church in tents.

This is the 10th year that Burt and about six to 12 others have braved the longest night of the year as a way to demonstrate “we understand, we care,” Burt said.

How about instead of a vigil you use those candles to light a fire to warm up the homeless people who are still alive? We don’t have vigils for the homed people who died in 2013, why do the homeless people get one? And you are going to sleep outside to show them that you understand?

How does it do homeless people one bit of good for you to sleep outside one night? If I’m homeless I’d much rather you let me sleep in your house one night than you sleeping in mine, but there’s no chance any one of these “volunteers” would ever let the guy who talks to the sidewalk sleep on their couch.

Sleeping outside and freezing your ass off to support homeless people is like supporting battered women by having your husband kick the shit out of you for one night. How does that help anyone?

Oh it demonstrates that “we understand, we care”? Really? You know what homeless people “understand and care” about? A fifth of Gin and a pack of Lucky Strikes. So pack up your shit and head to the liquor store if you really want to help, but don’t for a second trick yourself into thinking you made one bit of difference by sleeping in a sub zero sleeping bag inside of your EMS tent for one fucking night.

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Have we ever steered you wrong? Then don’t be an idiot and make sure you catch the Belles at least once in the next three days. Unless of course you want to be that person at all the Christmas parties that has no idea what everyone else is talking about. The three night run starts tonight!

Here is the link to BUY TICKETS online. Hurry up, they will sell out.

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Capecodtoday.com – NORTH TRURO – A North Truro woman faces OUI charges following her arrest on Route 6 last night. According to a Truro police release, the department received a call about a motorist who was headed to Truro after refusing to stop following a crash in Provincetown.

Around 9 p.m., Officer Valli and Officer Robicheau responded, finding the heavily damaged car traveling south in the northbound lane of Route 6. Roads were slick at the time due to recent snow activity, police said.

Look, we need to use words like “allegedly” because this woman hasn’t been convicted of anything in court yet, but you’ve got to be pretty messed up on something to drive the wrong way on rte. 6 in Truro. If you want to travel north or south in Truro there is literally ONE ROAD to do it on. This move is akin to walking up the down escalator. You can be totally incapacitated and you still have a 50/50 chance of traveling south in Truro on the correct road.

Also what on earth is the point of “refusing to stop” following a crash in P-Town? Where the fuck are you going? In case we haven’t mentioned it there is ONE ROAD to get away. I guess that’s why she tried to get sneaky and outsmart everybody by using the northbound lane to travel south. Good try, good effort. Maybe next time you’ll luck out and the cop in Truro will have called in sick that day.

 

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Daffy is missing. He is large friendly black duck. Large black ducks are not native so please contact me if you see one.

Question, are “missing” and “lost” the appropriate words here? I’m pretty sure Daffy isn’t missing or lost, Daffy flew away bro. Ducks don’t get lost, they have built in GPS and know where to eat, nest, get warm etc.

I think I figured out what is going on here when you said “large black ducks are not native”. This could be a Blind Side situation and some Cape Cod family adopted Daffy just to develop his football skills and get him to go to their alma mater.

Daffy isn’t missing, he probably just found out his adopted family wants him to go to Ole Miss, got pissed and left.

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What the hell did we just watch? Was this video seriously made by “Expert Village”? Because that looked more like a village idiot. Do me a favor Texas boy, next time you are on The Cape ask your local bartender for “A Cape Cod” and let us know how that works out for you.

1.5 ounces of vodka? Half vodka and half Cranberry in a Pint Glass or you’re drinking a vodka and cranberry, not a Cape Codder.

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Capecodtoday.com – EAST WAREHAM – A USPS delivery containing what looked like Christmas gifts contained a lot more, according to a Wareham police release. Last Thursday, the United States Police Office delivered a package to the home at 96 Plymouth Ave. in East Wareham.

When a resident of the home, 23-year-old Zachary Driscoll, took delivery of the package, police executed a search warrant, arresting Driscoll and seizing the package.

Inside the package, police found 25 individual plastic bags containing a combined 8 to 10 pounds of marijuana.

Police estimate the street value of the marijuana at $18,000 to $20,000.

Only Wareham criminals are dumber than Cape criminals. Wrapping the weed you are sending through the U.S. Mail to look like Christmas presents is going to get you caught 94% of the time. Everyone knows that a Christmas present is typically 68% more valuable than a regular package. Since 37% of mail carriers open 28% of the more valuable packages 42% of the time, Zachary Driscoll had a 100% chance of getting caught. That’s not opinion, that’s mathematics.

P.S. 10 pounds of weed valued at $20k is why Wareham is Wareham. They are the only people in the United States still smoking Mexican brick weed with branches in it and shit. Homeboy was probably gonna break all ten pounds down to dime bags that actually cost $10 because nobody told him it’s not 1983 anymore.

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony