Today In Crazy Cape Cod Criminals

BARNSTABLE — A Plymouth woman who worked at a Hyannis jewelry store was charged Monday with stealing and pawning around $30,800 worth of the jeweler’s goods…

After the store owner told Barnstable police he suspected McKinnon had taken other items, police allegedly found 25 transactions for about $25,000 worth of jewelry at two pawn shops in Plymouth and Hyannis.

The owner of the Plymouth shop told police that McKinnon came back in September, admitted what she had done and paid him $4,775, which she said came from her bank account, to cover the jewelry police seized.

But when they spoke with McKinnon about the alleged crimes, she admitted the money came from more jewelry she had pawned for $5,000 at another pawn shop, police said.

This might be my new favorite Crazy Cape Cod Criminal. Let me get this straight. This lady stole jewelry, and sold it at a pawn shop. When she felt bad that police seized the jewelry, she paid the pawn shop back “with money from her account” that was just money from pawning other stolen jewelry at a different pawn shop. Wait, what? Who’s on first?

So to make up for the fact that she sold stolen goods to a pawn shop, she sold different stolen goods to a different pawn shop. That my friends is like making up for punching someone in the face, by punching his brother in the nuts.

What’s with stolen gold getting seized from a pawn shop anyway? I always thought it was an unspoken agreement and everybody knew that pawn shops are places to fence stolen jewelry. I didn’t think that was a question of legality, I just thought that’s the way it is. If you have jewelry that is not stolen I thought you sold it to a jewelry place? And if you have jewelry that is stolen you take it down to Big Hoss and Chumlee and pawn that shit right?

I would never dream of telling the police how to do their business, I’m just saying I’m not so sure we should be messing with the age old symbiotic relationship between the pawn shops and the scumbags. Seems like we just shouldn’t screw with the balance of nature.