To Text or to Call? That is the Question..

I got in a pretty heated debate last week with a couple of guys at work about the topic of how to appropriately ask a girl out.

Beavis and Butthead tried telling me that not only is texting an acceptable and expected way of asking a girl out, but that they have never, nor would they, pick up a phone and directly call a girl to request her company for the night.

I found this unacceptable. They kept trying to spit some bullshit about how no one talks on the phone anymore and that calling a girl directly is too much pressure and scares her off.

Erroneous! Even my four year old niece picks up the phone when someone calls – a girl does not get ‘pressured’ when you call her directly. That is unless you’re a fucking psycho that waits for her outside of her building/watches her sleep in which case it doesn’t matter how you’re contacting her because she will run.

Not asking a girl out directly says one of three things;

1. You don’t give a shit about actually dating her, you just want to bang her – which is fine if that’s all you want, but then why even ask her on a date? See where she checks in on facebook and show up after she’s already hammer timed and invite her back to your place – way easier, less money to spend on your end and little-to-no expectation of a follow up call/date. You’re welcome
2. You don’t have the confidence required to ask her out because you’re scared of rejection. Although this objection is fair, it’s also bullshit. If people didn’t take chances we wouldn’t have things like, I dunno, cars..or Pez dispensers or fucking stiletto heels
3. You’re gay

This is the point where I’d like to add that both Beavis and Butthead are under the age of 25. Though I don’t think age should matter when determining whether or not you’re a gentleman, they felt the need to bring my age into the debate.

Me: You guys, I don’t care that texting or social media is the most popular form of communication right now! You pick up the phone and CALL her, or ask her in-person, end of story.

Beavis & Butthead: Jenny, times have changed since you started dating. Guys don’t do that stuff anymore.

Oh no they didn’t.

Me: Really? Really, guys? Times have changed so much in the three year age difference between us that gentleman no longer exist, girls are expected to fall at your feet and you literally have to put little to no effort in finding a girlfriend?

Beavis & Butthead: Yeah. It’s called Tinder.

Fuck.