CapeCodTimes.com – A charity group’s donation jar collecting funds for Boston Marathon bombing victims was stolen from the lobby of West Bend Music on Main Street, according to police and a woman who helped write a song about the 2013 attack.
The jar contained between $200 and $300, Dennis Police Officer Ryan Carr said.

The donation jar was intended to raise money for the Gillian Reny Stepping Strong Fund at Brigham and Women’s Hospital, created by the family of Gillian Reny, who was seriously injured in the bombings near the marathon’s finish line, said Carol Adams, of Brewster. The fund aims to help those dealing with traumatic limb injuries.

Anyone with information about the theft of the jar should call Dennis police at 508-394-1313.

Ding, ding, ding… We’ve got a winner! Taking over the top spot from the guy who stole the musicians tip jar is the Marathon Bombing Victims Jar thief. You just can’t sink any lower than this folks. This dude just bought himself a $200 ticket straight to hell. Even the church collection plate thief has a better chance at getting through the pearly gates than whoever stole this donation jar.

If they catch this dude the only logical punishment is to chop off his legs and give them to the victims he stole from. I don’t even care if they can’t use them, they can stuff them and hang them on their mantle, as long as this klepto prick suffers the same fate as the people he stole from.

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FPD – Attempted Abduction at Bus Stop (Falmouth) This morning, two men attempted to entice a middle school age female into their vehicle from her bus stop. The girl did not enter the vehicle and is safe. The men were reported to be white with tattoos, beards, and bandanas. The vehicle was described as a white construction style van. The safety of children is a priority and the Falmouth Police Department along with other local agencies are attempting to locate and identify the individuals involved with this incident. Please contact the Falmouth Police Department at 774-255-4527 if you see these men or have further information. ###

When people from Falmouth think two creepy dudes  with bandanas in a white van, they think Squirrel Brothers. These dudes have been creeping people out for years. Keep an eye out folks and don’t approach them, even if it wasn’t the Squirrels, you still don’t want to approach them.

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Freckles huh? Cute name. Almost makes you forget the 300 teeth on a conveyor belt of death. Nothing like waking up the morning after a tornado to a brand new video of a 15 ft. shark swimming in your backyard. Cape Cod is giving Dante’s Inferno a run for its money these days. If the thunder don’t get ‘ya then the Great White will.

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Severe thunderstorms are rumbling across Massachusetts, and forecasters say they could spawn tornadoes.

The National Weather Service has issued a tornado watch for most of Massachusetts, effective until 11 p.m. Tuesday.

Forecasters said wind gusts up to 70 miles per hour are possible as the thunderstorms storms cross the state from west to east, as well as hail up to an inch in diameter.

It’s a twister! I just saw an empty bottle of Fireball and a carton of Newports fly by my window. Everybody take cover and stay safe, and by take cover and stay safe we mean start drinking immediately. A tornado is an even better reason to get drunk than a blizzard.

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CapeNews – Many boaters attempting to launch their vessels at the popular White’s Landing have left frustrated over the last few weeks, unable to slide their boats into the water because of the new ramp’s faulty design.

Falmouth’s most popular public boat ramp, located on Childs River, received an overhaul last month to repair its aging and decrepit concrete ramp, costing the state Office of Fishing and Boating Access $300,000.

However, the ramp was engineered with too gradual of a grade, based on there being three feet of water at mean low tide, when in fact the water is 1.5 feet there at the lowest tide, said Famouth Harbor Master Gregg P. Fraser.

YOU HAD ONE JOB. Seriously though, is this not the perfect example of why the government shouldn’t be in charge of construction projects? Imagine if you were put in charge of building a boat ramp at work and you just straight up failed. You didn’t make a crappy boat ramp, you made one that simply doesn’t work half the time. You would be fired faster than Gary Busey on Celebrity Apprentice.

Not once, through the planning, designing, engineering or construction did one person notice that this new ramp wasn’t going to work. Everyone just whistled Dixie, built a ramp all wrong and then went on their way. Then when boaters complain they’re like “Oh, you wanted to use that ramp at high tide AND low tide? OK, no big deal, we’ll just spend some more of your money to fix it.”

A $300,000 boat ramp that doesn’t launch boats at low tide. Take a bow Massachusetts, you never cease to amaze.

thanks to J.R. for the tip

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Northern lights sighting over Cape Cod last night #capecod #aurora pic.twitter.com/Fz6ZQkhqeO

— Matt Mullin (@Matt5Mullin) June 23, 2015

It seems like the Northern Lights are visible more and more from the Cape. I’m not 100% sure it’s really happening though. I still haven’t seen them myself or actually met anyone in person that has seen them either. Does anyone know if there is an app for phone cameras that lets you add the Northern Lights to a photo of any sky?

It would be a pretty sweet app if not. You could really mess with those weirdo people that somehow equate seeing the northern lights with being cool. You know that neighbor who probably played Magic the Gathering in High School. You could just be like, “Yup, saw ’em again last night” every time you see him and then watch with glee as he angrily clutches the latest issue of MAD magazine he just grabbed out of his R2-D2 mailbox.

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CCT – On this day in 1933 the Cape Cod Canal was closed because a lighter carrying rocks hit a rock in the canal and sunk in three minutes.

The Eastern Steamship Company freighter Sandwich attempted to edge pass the sunken lighter but scrapped against it and was grounded itself on the opposite shore.

Too bad there weren’t blogs in 1933. Jebediah “Hippie” Gosnold would’ve had a field day writing about this. A barge carrying rocks hitting a rock and sinking is just inherently funny. It’s like a waiter carrying a tray of banana peels slipping on a banana, the irony is so thick it makes my brain explode from punchline overload, I’m not even sure which joke to make.

What I do know is this. I’m going to bookmark this post, and whenever I’m convinced the world is going to shit I’m coming back and reading this. Oh, it took us longer to paint the Bourne Bridge than it did for our great grandparents to build it? Well at least we didn’t sink a boat full of rocks by running into a rock. I mean, If you were the captain of a vessel carrying rocks wouldn’t you just say to yourself over and over… “Don’t hit a rock, do NOT hit a rock. If you hit a rock you will never live it down. Keep an eye out for rocks and whatever you do DON’T. HIT. A ROCK!”

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