Cape Cod Craigslist Ad Of The Day – College Female Needs $600 By Tomorrow

craigs

CL – College female needs $600 by tomorrow (rent)

compensation: $600
Beautiful female college student needs $600 by tomorrow for rent. I’m late and need it by the 3 day grace period I’m given by my landlord. Let me know what you can offer and let’s talk. Send phone number to avoid email banter as time is of the essence. Thank you!!

Dear Daughter I Don’t Have Yet Just In Case,

Hey sweetie! It’s me, your dad. I am writing all the way from the year 2014! I know that may seem strange, but I came across this Craigslist ad today that made me think of you even though you don’t exist. I just wanted to let you know something, in case you are ever born.

If you EVER need $600 bad enough that you are thinking about resorting to open ads on the internet to get it. CALL ME IMMEDIATELY! I don’t care if the money is for a crack and heroin sandwich. I will give you $600 no questions asked, at the drop of a hat, if you tell me it’s either going to be me or some random creepshow from Craigslist.

P.S. I hope it’s not too hot in the basement, don’t worry you only have 27 more years until we let you out!

Love,
Hippie (Dad)

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

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