Scientists Asking For Whale Tale Photos From Cape Cod Boaters

whale tail

CapeCodOnline.com – A new “Carib Tails” international citizen science effort has begun to track humpback whale seasonal migrations between Stellwagen Bank National Marine Sanctuary and marine sanctuaries in the Caribbean, according to recent materials released by Stellwagen Bank officials.

Boaters are asked to photograph the tails of humpbacks they encounter at sea to support ongoing research on the approximately 1,000 humpbacks that migrate between Stellwagen Bank and its Caribbean partners.

The photographs will be matched with existing entries in the North Atlantic Humpback Whale Catalog and could be added to the collection – particularly if the humpbacks are previously unknown or unphotographed.

Oh look at that an “international citizen science effort” and they want Cape Codders to photograph whale tales from their boats. Well if they can get people to do all of their work for them and add to their picture collection then so can we.

The Real Cape would like to announce our “Cape Cod citizen science effort” where we ask all of you Cape Codders to send US your photos of whale tales in their natural habitat as well. Only we don’t want pics of Moby Dick, we are looking for submissions of a slightly different type of whale tale.

whale tale
Gives new meaning to the term “Humpback” AMIRITE?

So remember Cape Cod, have your cameras ready at all times. You never know when a whale tale might just pop out of nowhere. We will do our part and “study” every photo we get… you know, for science.

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Hey Hippies, Make Up Your Minds!

hippie
Except her, she can do whatever she wants.

CapeCodOnline.com – BREWSTER — It’s a question of seeing the forest through the trees for opponents of a solar energy project that would require clear-cutting sections of woodland off Commerce Park Road.

The area is already home to industrial activity, including a half-dozen businesses and an existing community solar project. But the backdrop for those businesses is an important ecological resource in the form of a 100-year-old pine-oak forest, according to two men fighting a 4.6-megawatt solar energy project planned for the area.

“Personally, it’s a mind-blowing idea, in 2014, that they would cut down a forest to put up a solar array,” said Paul Gasek, an Emmy Award-winning producer and a former senior science editor for The Discovery Channel who lives in town.

Gasek and Christopher Powicki, a vocal supporter of renewable energy who has nonetheless sparred with the cooperative over specific projects and policies, argue that the potential benefit from the solar project at Commerce Park wouldn’t outweigh the detriment of the nearly 29 acres of clear-cutting necessary.

Fucking Hippies. They want nothing more than to end our reliance on fossil fuels by using alternate sources of energy but when we want to build a solar array they whine about cutting down a few pine trees. Listen guys we aren’t talking about the rain forest here, these aren’t 1,000 year old Redwood trees. These are pine trees growing out of a big fucking sand bar. I’m pretty sure the world’s oxygen supply won’t be at risk if we chop down a few trees in Brewster.

Everybody on Cape Cod is an environmentalist these days and wants renewable energy right up until the point when they actually start building the facilities. Windmills cause vertigo and ruin water views! Solar panels take up space that could hold an organic garden! Nuclear plants can melt down killing tens of thousands of people and scorching the earth! Wah!

Make up your minds and either stop complaining about all these alternative energy projects or keep your mouth shut when my friends and I are re-enacting the Zoolander gas fight while we fill up our 8 mpg trucks.

 

P.S. Yes my name is Hippie, no it was not given to me because I smoke weed and hug trees all day, but that is a story for another time. Yes I do like the environment but I also dislike “environmentalists”. I know… I’m so mysterious.

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Reader Photo Of The Day – Giant Snow Penis? Giant Snow Penis.

dick

These guys really love cock!

So this was apparently taken on something called Dynamite Day which is on January 5th. These guys start drinking at 7 a.m. and don’t stop until 2 a.m. I guess? Yeah, my friends and I have a name for that as well, we call it Saturdays. Bottom line though is if you send us a photo of an eight foot dick we are publishing it 12 times out of 10.

Next time could you at least pee “The Real Cape” into the snow or something, or even better you could invite us to Dynamite Day. I just can’t promise that we would stop drinking at 2 a.m. though, that seems a little early.

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Falmouth Man Arrested For Ax Assault

bunyon

CapeCodOnline.com – FALMOUTH — A 33-year-old Falmouth man pleaded not guilty to a charge of assault and battery with a dangerous weapon at his arraignment in Falmouth District Court on Wednesday.

Dana O’Keefe, of Braeside Road, allegedly threatened to kill a man with an ax, records show. The dispute was allegedly over a girlfriend.

Hey Falmouth, chill out. It seems like every story about whacked out Cape Cod criminals lately is coming out of there. It’s like Falmouth is trying to take Hy-Town’s crown as the ghetto of the peninsula. You’ve got dudes slanging guns, chicks sucking on Reddi Whip cans in supermarkets and now Paul Bunyon here is avenging his girlfriend’s honor with an ax?

What happened to the good old days when Hyannis was where the lunatics roamed and Falmouth was just known as that cute little place that discovered the Titanic and sues itself because its windmills cause AIDS?

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Falmouth Man Arrested On Gun Charges

ruger

FALMOUTH ­— A 32-year-old Falmouth man was arraigned Monday after police said he was in possession of a semi-automatic handgun without a firearm identification card.

Robert Madigan, of Eric Clauson Lane, was arrested Saturday and later released on $2,500 bail.

Earlier in the day, police said, Madigan called friends and said he had something to show them at his house.

Madigan allegedly pulled a black semi-automatic handgun out of his pants and described it as a Ruger, telling his visitors he had more of the guns and was interested in selling them for “$250 a pop,” police said.

I just want to give this dude a quick piece of advice and I’m gonna make it short and sweet. If you invite your friends over in the morning to show them your sweet new Ruger and you end up in jail on weapons charges before lunch is ready? I think it’s time to think about getting some different friends.

I guess it’s true what they say, you really find out who your real friends are when you’re selling unregistered firearms.

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Pilot Whale Euthanized In Chatham, Or Was He Murdered? DUN DUN DUUUNNN!

"But I'm not dead yet"
“I’m not dead yet”

CapeCodOnline.com – CHATHAM – A pilot whale found stranded around noon today on Harding Beach was euthanized later in the evening after members of the International Fund for Animal Welfare were unable to get the whale into deep water.

IFAW’s Marine Mammal Rescue and Research team responded to the scene around 2 p.m.

The approximately 3,000 pound whale was in overall good condition, said Kerry Branon, an IFAW spokeswoman. The team planned to satellite tag and then release the whale, but they were unable to get the whale back into deep water, Branon said. After a consultation with an on-site veterinarian, the team realized the whale could not be saved, she said.

“They did everything they could to minimize its suffering, and in the end, euthanasia was the most humane option available,” Branon said.

Quick question? How do they know that whale couldn’t have made it back into deep water? Maybe when there aren’t humans around whales come up into shallow water all the time and then just stand up and walk on their fins back to deep water when they decide they are done. Prove they don’t. They did say the whale was in “overall good condition”. I don’t know, something smells a bit… (I know, I’m sorry I won’t even say it).

Anyway, how the hell do we know when a whale “can’t be saved”? Just because it can’t be saved by people doesn’t mean a whale doesn’t have some tricks up its sleeve for survival that we don’t know about. I think we as a people have become a bit too arrogant when we start Terry Schiavoing whales at the drop of a hat, who elected us the Dr. Kevorkian of the animal kingdom? I’m pretty sure those scientists murdered that whale and I demand an investigation.

 

P.S. If you are contemplating leaving a comment saying whales aren’t fish, please euthanize yourself.

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

The Fun Police Are Going After Skydiving On Cape Cod

skydive-cape-cod

WickedLocal.com – The airport commission has approved a new contract for Skydive Cape Cod, the town manager will not sign it, and the Federal Aviation Administration, which may be the final arbiter, has not yet ruled.

The town is looking to obtain a waiver or an exemption from the FAA that would allow selectmen to prohibit skydiving and the board has laid out its concerns, which include its close proximity to neighborhoods, to the agency. The FAA has agreed to send parachute experts to Chatham to investigate the claims this spring, but Goldsmith told selectmen Tuesday that it was unclear what that inspection would involve as the company would not be cleared by the town to operate. That’s something staff is waiting for clarification on, she said.

Over the past few years concerns about the safety of the operation of the skydive company at the municipal airport have emerged, but last year they appeared to mushroom as myriad residents filled the selectmen’s meeting room and asked the three-year contract not be renewed.

Unbelievable, you literally couldn’t make this stuff up. How many hard working people have had their livelihoods taken away by The Fun Police at this point? Eventually we will get to the point where Cape Cod residents will not be able to leave their yards or make any audible sounds.

Skydive Cape Cod has been around for a long time and everyone I know who has gone there has nothing but great things to say about them. Who am I though right? Well the “FEDERAL AVIATION AMINISTRATION and the state department of transportation found no safety issues that would justify termination of the lease.” In fact Skydive Cape Cod was the most inspected operation in the country this year.

It doesn’t stop there, Tim Howard, the owner of the company that runs Catham Airport said the airport has “no good reason” not to renew the contract, or sub-lease, and could be a subject to a lawsuit if one was not executed. So yeah, the federal government is on SkyDive Cape Cod’s side to the point where it is illegal to not let them operate, yet they are in danger of losing their business, and why?

Because a “myriad residents filled the selectmen’s meeting room and asked the three-year contract not be renewed.” That’s it, The Fun Police. Who are these people? Don’t they have anything better to do with their time than worry about everyone else? It is time to band together and take back Cape Cod.

Please, if you live in Chatham or the surrounding area, reach out to the folks at SkyDive Cape Cod and ask them how you can help, Write a letter, go to a meeting, whatever it takes. I know we have better things to do but that is why they always win. While we are out living our lives they are at meetings making fun illegal. We need to beat them at their own game, say it with me!

Fuck the fun police!

Take back Cape Cod!

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Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony