The Fun Police Shut Down South Cape Beach

beach

Capenews.net – The summer has gotten off to a rocky start with a rash of vandalism and nighttime parties at South Cape Beach State Park, prompting management to close the beach to visitors after 8 PM for the remainder of the season.

The gates to the park have traditionally been open for nighttime visitors after the park stops charging for beach parking at 5 PM.

The new gate closing policy took effect after the July Fourth holiday weekend.

John J. Singleton, facilities supervisor for the Waquoit Bay National Estuarine Research Reserve, which oversees the park for the Massachusetts Department of Conservation and Recreation, said the new policy has been very effective in curtailing rowdy after-dark behavior at the beach.

“We cater to people during the day, not people at night. Closing the gates at 8 PM is the best thing we’ve ever done,” he said.

At the Tuesday, July 15, meeting of the South Cape State Beach Advisory Committee at Mashpee Town Hall, Mr. Singleton described some of the hooliganism that occurred at the park earlier this season.

Mr. Singleton also reported that he came across a full-fledged party, complete with a disc jockey with generator-powered speakers, set up on the beach one evening.

Oh my god! I for one can not believe this. I’ve heard whispers and horror stories about this kind of thing before, but never this close to home. I can not believe that right here on our own peninsula, right under our noses, there has been actual… real… full fledged… HOOLIGANISM?!?!?

(quick press play)

Hey you know what people did at South Cape Beach at night in the ’70’s? They partied. Hey you know what people did at South Cape Beach at night in the ’80’s? They partied. Hey you kno… Alright you get the point.

The Fun Police should just cut through the chase and shut the whole world down at night. Seriously, just close earth at 6 p.m. Sorry folks, but the roads, the woods, the beaches… all closed. Earth will re open in the morning, but until then just lay in bed and stare at your idiot box until 7 a.m. You all just can’t be trusted to use earth at night, sorry.

P.S. Whoever threw that party with the DJ, a generator and speakers?  How about a heads up email next time?

P.P.S. Did you know that in other vacation destination areas they actually let people party on their beaches? Insane right? Don’t they know the best way to attract visitors is to frown upon fun and not allow them to do things they can’t do at home?

Facebook: The Real Cape
Twitter: Hippie - Insane Tony

Comments 4

  1. As I live on the cape year round I would love to go to beach parties! As an employee that has to pick up after the mindless pigs, some had this coming. I have seen my share of well rounded partiers and have some great memories, but the mess and complete disrespect for this loved "vacation" spot most of call home is horrifying! And yes, I have a problem with "snow birds" (ass hats that live here 2-3 months a year) complaining about noise.

  2. Evolution of the fun police.
    1. People find something new and exciting to do and slide under the radar.
    2. people get carried away and do something dumb, like leave trash all over a state park, get uncontrollably fucked up or generaly act like a pain in the ass.
    3. People fail to self police or make amends for bad behavior.
    4. fun thing gets banned because some people can't handle fun.
    Repeat steps 1-4

    It's just like kindergarden, where a few dumbasses can ruin it for everyone else.
    PS: wesley, if you pissed off the town council, best not to brag about it. They could hit you with a fine for permits and cleanup. (see step 2/3)

    Remember life is like kindergarden,

  3. Evolution of the fun police.
    1. People find something new and exciting to do and slide under the radar.
    2. a minority in the group gets carried away and does something dumb, like leave trash all over a state park, gets uncontrollably fucked up, or generaly act like a pains in the ass.
    3. The responsible fun lovers fail to self police or make amends for bad behavior.
    4. fun thing gets banned because of of the minority of dumbasses.
    Repeat steps 1-4 untill everything fun or potentially fun is banned.

    It's just like kindergarden, where a few dumbasses can ruin it for everyone else. You throw crayons around? No more coloring. Kids sneaking off at recess? recess indoors. Some kid jumps off the slide and breaks a leg? No more playground.
    Fast forward a few years. Because of dipshits we cant have awesome things like fireworks, ninja stars, public intoxication, smoking on the beach, diving boards at public pools. The list goes on and on.

    IF you want to point the blame at someone. Point it at DJ IPOD and his harddrive of techoshit. He waas not only called out as a compelling reason for the early closures, this fuckwad was actually dumb enough to brag about something he got away with. I hope you get fined for being such a dumbass.

    I dont see any fault with what the DCR's decision. You brought this on yourself.

    PS: Theres a lession here for you RealCape, you better believe if some MDMA amature or wave of drunken sunstroked teens start collapsing at your festival, or you completely trash the Falmouth Fairgrounds, not even pufferbellies will take one of your future gigs. Dont fuck it up like DJ selfie did. (or if you do fuck up, have a scapegoat with his name on the contract)

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