Bank Robbery In Hyannis – Did You Realize How Easy It Is To Rob A Bank?

By Hippie

5 Dec

eastern

Barnstable Police are seeking information about a man who robbed the Eastern Bank, 375 Iyannough Road, around 12:30 p.m., Wednesday, Dec. 4.

The suspect implied he was armed and left the scene with cash, according to capecodonline.com

As I was reading this I thought about something that got me thinking. Wait, what? Anyway, it seems like more often than not when I read a story about a bank being robbed, the police are always “seeking information” about the perpetrator, not locking him up. So I decided to do a little research. After an exhaustive Google search which led to two link clicks and the scanning of nearly 5 paragraphs, I found this out…

In the United States Of America in the year 2012 bank robbers were successful 60% of the time. Sixty. Freaking. Percent. No joke up until today I would have guessed that the average person had about a 2% chance of robbing a bank and getting away with it. Is this the best kept secret in the crime game right now or did people know this?

Do you know how many players in the NBA hit 60% of their baskets? TWO. Professional basketball players have less of a chance of hitting a jump shot than you do at getting away with a bank robbery. Not even 60% of dentists recommend sugarless gum. Anyone not robbing banks is just giving away money right now, but if you are a criminal and you are doing anything other than robbing banks then don’t cry to me when you don’t make millions and end up in jail.

P.S. Shit, did I just drop myself under 60% by publishing my fondness for robbing banks?

 

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  1. Another Armed Robbery On The Cape - The Real Cape - 12/09/2013

    […] Forget about crab fisherman in Alaska, convenience store clerk on Cape Cod is officially the most dangerous job in the world. It seems like we have a new armed robbery in the news every day now. They all seem to get caught too, hasn’t anyone told these guys about how easy it is to get away with bank robbery? […]

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